We are more helpful when we see others helping
www.pakpositive.com
I had to visit my university recently, and I opted to use my usual method: the bus.
But there is a problem with my usual bus route. It is normally crowded and by the time the bus gets to my stop, it is filled up, and you have to stand all the way to ISB. But you get used to it... eventually.
This time when I got on the bus, there were just two of us standing; a couple of stops later two more girls got on the bus and had to stand. But a minute later, somehow some of the girls squeezed in and managed to make room for the two of them.
Another minute or two later while I was busy feeling a little dejected, another seated girl tugged at me and offered a seat she and the girl next to her had squeezed in as well.
I gave up that offer though because the other girl standing next to me was trying to revise her notes "let her sit instead" I said.
Less than a minute later another group of girls squeezed in and finally I was able to sit down. Next stop two more girls got on, and after standing for a bit they were also offered seats; where previously there weren't any.
I liked this whole turn of events a lot, it instilled a 'feel good' vibe in me since I'm so used to the 'every one for themselves' attitude that is usually prevailing in these buses. So I started wondering why this all happened in the first place.
Maybe it was just because the bus wasn't as crowded as usual; and so they felt more awkward about the 'few' people standing. Maybe the behaviour of the first group of girls 'caught on' with the others; and so they started feeling more generous and helpful. Maybe it was a combination of both.
But do people become more helpful when they see others helping?
In psychology helpful behaviour that benefits others without necessarily benefiting the individual helping is referred to as prosocial behaviour. Making yourself a little uncomfortable to give comfort to others certainly qualifies as prosocial behaviour (some may argue that it is just polite behaviour).
One factor that research has shown to enhance helping is the presence of 'prosocial models' the presence of a helpful person is known to provide at times a 'model' of desirable behaviour to follow. So when the first group of girls managed to make room for the standing girls this may have acted as a model of behaviour for others to follow. Resulting in the generosity of other passengers.
Which goes to show that it doesn't matter how insignificant your actions seem, never hesitate to be kind to others even in a small way. Try to smile often, say thank you, and say please.
Because evidently it's catchy.
helping others www.pakpositive.com
I heard the conversation of few gentlemen sitting on the back seats of a public bus.and these words from a young man broke my heart.hmm....
I can't pretend anymore of not listening and suddenly looked back and I must have exhibited the glance of disgust...to that young man...it halted the conversation at once.
He was standing near the steel bar which separates the ladies and gents compartment in a public bus.
The driver tried to overcome a bike and instantly pushed the break paddles.most of the passengers who were standing lost their balance and with a jerk he came near to the steel bar.
I was about to hit my forehead to the steel bar too..but a strong hand stopped it from hitting the steel bar.the same hand somehow managed to hold my head until I regained my balance.it took me a minute or two to came back to my senses.of course someone from the male compartment took the liberty to save me.
He was there.he was tall.so I have to literally look up to see his expressions.he was looking innocently at me."are you okay sister?" he asked with a faint smile.
I smiled too.hmm...overwhelmed by the incident.all the other ladies were looking at me too.most of them were asking the same question.I had drop my belongings.few young school girls were picking them up for me.
"You see..that's what I was talking about just few minutes ago.these bus drivers have no humanity.they have no sense of respect to the ladies too.they are cursed and no one can call them human at all.they are stupid..hey.you bus driver.pathan bhai...stop.drop me here.and be good with other passengers.you stupid.someday I will come back to give you a lesson."
With these words he crossed the ladies compartment and within a moment he was out of the bus.
Though we were travelling together.our destiny was different...even our approach towards life was different.
I wanted to thank him for what he did.I wanted to give him hope.and I wanted to give him few words on faith.
Besides all his cursing and un-bearable words about my beloved country.I found him a good person.
A person.deep down inside has a willingness to help and to keep good terms with other humans.
This is true that most of our youth has a desire to go abroad..they want to earn more.want every luxury and want a respectful life...
And.beloved Country has lost their faith...hope.on it.
There is nothing we can offer to these young men.there is nothing which can stop them here.and there is nothing for them to have faith on.
Even then.I would only say:
Have faith.have faith as it is your choice.it can be a gift to your beloved Country.make it your decision...an active one..
Faith is not the result of miracles. Rather miracles are the result of faith.
Faith is not faith unless we first open our eyes and look even when it seems that nothing will be there.
But once when we open our eyes..we will see. Our beloved Country will be healed because of our faith.
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